I held off on posting this for several weeks now. I have seriously messed up. I am posting it now because most people are already aware of what has taken place. I am not trying to justify my actions as there is no justification.
I started this on the 29th. The post was named for a friend, I have now lost. My fault.
Sometimes loneliness gets the best of me. I don’t know what it is, but I feel so empty on days like this when I don’t have much to do. I just start thinking and realize that I don’t have anyone to think about, no one to call my own.
It’s been about a week and a half, lost for words. Reaching far… I am really into her, but who am I kidding? I don’t deserve it. It isn’t real. It will pass. She is young and just discovering things. I don’t want to disrupt her life but I fear I already have. No matter how hard I fight it. I want to be near her. It’s unbelievable but I spend so much time on the phone with her. It hasn’t been long. I am just a fad though, she is with someone and I am just a fleeting moment but still I find myself looking forward to interacting with her.